Real Desires
February 8, 2001
Trust in the Lord, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. Delight thyself also in the Lord; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.
Our focus text, which members studied during the week, includes a number of interesting questions—for instance, wherefrom the desire to walk, what is the light, what about those bleeding footsteps, what's entailed in waiting patiently, what are real desires, and how can we make practical the concept of being rewarded by Him? We had time to investigate only two areas: real desires and bleeding footsteps.
Of course, virtually everyone wants to be healthy, wealthy, wise and loved. Mrs. Eddy and others tell us that desire is prayer — so we needn't, indeed mustn't, denigrate our desires. As our Freudian member never tires of saying, if human life is a dream, it is burgeoning with "wish content" or desires, every moment. Our Christian Science practice can start with reading all motives and actions of ourselves and others as desire or prayer. Thence it can flourish mightily by seeing through desire — a dualistic human activity — to the underlying non-dualistic reality just at hand to be lived. This is the place where healing occurs, and "our real desires [are] rewarded by Him."
What about the bleeding footsteps? Is this an outcropping of Victorian masochism or something deeper?
Well, some members felt it was basically a misleading overstatement. In Science, if a path is good why should there be any bleeding footsteps? One member saw the jarring imagery as alerting us of how messy a change of standpoint can look. When our divine Selfhood is driving the transformation the attendant chemicalization is a good sign, not a bad one, but we certainly saw the need to stay awake to the basic fact that bleeding anything indicates that there is work still to do in giving up mortal beliefs, however hidden or seemingly innocent.
One member brought up self righteousness as an example of how a member of a church, or our group, might be doing wonderful work but still see himself as spiritually superior to others, always ready to give them a metaphysical boost or perhaps some merited criticism behind their back — why this latter procedure would be regarded as a good thing we could not tell, but we all had to admit we do it. Might we have a look at things like this when healing eludes us or our lives are out of kilter? There's nothing to get all ruffled about here however since animosity and mere personal attachment, to use Mrs. Eddy's terminology, are the sum and substance of mortal mind's interpretation of divine Love. The solution: start living as Love and not as a mortal.
A member brought in readings about Jesus in Gethsemane (meaning "oil press" in Hebrew. This resonates wonderfully with Mrs. Eddy's insight into "oil" in the Glossary of Science and Health.) The Savior surrendered personal sense to his divine Self and progressed to ascension, with remaining problems indicating simply that bits of mortal belief were still clinging.
Adam and Eve by contrast partook of beliefs in good and evil, a.k.a. matter, thus compounding their personal sense of themselves and God. Untold bleeding footsteps ensue from the misunderstanding of being embodied in this myth; but of course, immediate redemption is just at hand by living one's self and others as divine idea rather than material concept.
One member saw the movie "Cast Away" during the week and was anxious to evaluate it in light of our topic. The lead character regresses to a primal level of existence, ushering in a much needed, if wrenching, character transformation away from ego drives to deeper sources of inspiration, including altruism. The question came up: could a seemingly extraneous event like a plane crash be seen as an synchronicity bespeaking revulsion with one's current mode of living and an invitation to growth and renewal? Perhaps, who could say; but Mr. Hank's character did make use of the opportunity. There are many stories in the Bible from which this movie script may have drawn some breath — e.g., Job, Nebuchadnezzar (see Daniel 4: 28-37), Saul/Paul, and even Christ Jesus.
A member talked of some fruitage from work he has been doing in Science to see his human place and work based on his assured place and function in the universe established by God. He suddenly received a call this week for a dance audition — his first such inquiry in many years — and felt quite secure in accepting. He felt no fear about it and went to the occasion with great energy and spirits. It went very well; those holding the audition kept him occupied showing his stuff for three dance numbers all at fast tempo. He left with a very good feeling about the audition and thinks it will ultimate in some employment. Additionally, his work in Science and this audition broke the dream of inactivity that has plagued him for years in a field which most closely represents his talent. Broadway watch out!
We discussed briefly some leading surface desires which we and others experience and what might be their underlying realities. How about a boyfriend? Could that be about wholeness, completeness, bliss? What about financial security? Perhaps we really want divine salvation, with every need and want fully supplied—be it health, joy, wisdom. Could a billion dollars assure that? The point here is to live the divine counter fact of whatever the surface desire seems to dictate.
As to how to have the symbol as well as the underlying reality, this seemed to us the very essence and genius of Christian Science. We didn't have time to get very far with this point but several members thought the Christian Science Quarterly Bible Lesson for this week on Spirit, Section 6, had some excellent quotations bearing on this aspect of real desires. Included is this statement from Science and Health: "The Revelator was on our plane of existence, while yet beholding what the eye cannot see, — that which is invisible to the uninspired thought. This testimony of Holy Writ sustains the fact in Science, that the heavens and earth to one human consciousness, that consciousness which God bestows, are spiritual, while to another, the unillumined human mind, the vision is material. This shows unmistakably that what the human mind terms matter and spirit indicates states and stages of consciousness." (p. 573:3)
This indicated to one member that we can live not as surfaces or shells among other shells, but as full blooded, four dimensional divine ideas, including all others as divine ideas. This would have the effect of integrating deepest desires — i.e., realities — with their symbolic representations. In such living, schizoid flipping back and forth between matter and spirit would have to cease. Dropping the symbol for some etherealized spiritual existence would be as dangerous as going whole hog into the symbol.
For next week we'll look at Partners. This topic grows out of our interest in the demonstration of divine Love by a member of Emergence, as set forth several weeks ago in e-mails to members through the GayLesBi share line and reprinted recently in "In Between Times".
Then cometh Jesus with them unto a place called Gethsemane, and saith unto the disciples, Sit ye here, while I go and pray yonder. And he took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be sorrowful and very heavy. Then saith he unto them, My soul is exceeding sorrowful, even unto death: tarry ye here, and watch with me. And he went a little farther, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt. And he cometh unto the disciples, and findeth them asleep, and saith unto Peter, What, could ye not watch with me one hour? Watch and pray, that ye enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. He went away again the second time, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done. And he came and found them asleep again: for their eyes were heavy. And he left them, and went away again, and prayed the third time, saying the same words. Then cometh he to his disciples, and saith unto them, Sleep on now, and take your rest: behold, the hour is at hand, and the Son of man is betrayed into the hands of sinners.
The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light.
seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
When the human element in him struggled with the divine, our great Teacher said: "Not my will, but Thine, be done!" — that is, Let not the flesh, but the Spirit, be represented in me. This is the new understanding of spiritual Love.
Better the suffering which awakens mortal mind from its fleshly dream, than the false pleasures which tend to perpetuate this dream.
The more material the belief, the more obvious its error, until divine Spirit, supreme in its domain, dominates all matter, and man is found in the likeness of Spirit, his original being.
The understanding of Truth and Love, the Principle which works out the ends of eternal good and destroys both faith in evil and the practice of evil, leads to the discernment of the divine idea.
Because of his more spiritual vision, St. John saw an "angel standing in the sun."
John saw the human and divine coincidence, shown in the man Jesus, as divinity embracing humanity in Life and its demonstration, — reducing to human perception and understanding the Life which is God.
In my reflections at that time it seemed to me that life was an incomprehensible enigma; that the creator had placed us on this earth, and left us entirely in the dark as to His purpose in so doing. We seemed to be cast upon the ocean of time, and left to drift aimlessly about, with no exact knowledge of what was required of us or how to attain unto the truth, which must certainly have an existence somewhere. It seemed to me that in the very nature of things there must be a great error somewhere in our understanding, or that the creator Himself had slipped a cog when He fitted all things into their proper spheres. That there had been a grand mistake somewhere I had no doubt; but I still had doubt enough of my own capabilities and understanding to believe that the mistake, whatever it was, was in me and not in the creator. I knew that, in a fair measure at least, I had an honest desire to live aright, as it was given me to see the right, and to strive to some extent to do the will of God, if I could only know certainly just what it was.