Bisexuality
March 1, 2001
I have long time holden my peace; I have been still, and refrained myself: now will I cry like a travailing woman; I will destroy and devour at once.
As one whom his mother comforteth, so will I comfort you; and ye shall be comforted in Jerusalem.
Bisexuality has a certain chic and, as Woody Allen observed, doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night. It can be a gentle way to let out the news that in fact you're totally Gay and a convenient excuse to end a relationship: "Sorry friend, but my heterosexuality just kicked in."These represent the sorts of biases we were rolling with last week when we took on the topic; most were unprepared for how rich and deep a subject it is. What follows can only suggest avenues readers may want to explore on their own.
The Lesbian Almanac says a bisexual is a "person who has sexual and emotional relationships with both women and men, though not necessarily at the same time."Our members found in their studies and reflections during the week that everyone is a bisexual. This conclusion is based on biological, psychological and spiritual data.
Of course we had to spend some time on our definitions here. Sex is both a behavior and a state of existence. One's gender appearance may or may not reflect his or her expected behavior according to stereotypes. The terms active and passive, top and bottom might be useful in this regard. Thus an "active or top heterosexual female"is much more descriptive of sexual desire and behavior than simply "woman".
The important point for us was that whatever one's elaboration of desires, attitudes and activities, the underlying fact is still bisexuality. Biologists find that men have female hormones and women male hormones. Both sexes have masculine and feminine drives. And most religions, certainly Christian Science, show the androgynous nature of man (even if it has to be done in a round about way like living one's so called opposite sex strictly through a person "out there").
We zeroed in on the spiritual aspect of course. Readers may want to see notes on earlier discussions by this group of related subjects ([#topic=19991104#] and [#topic=19991111#]). Most Greek and Roman gods were bisexual. One member told the story on the Hindu god Krishna converting himself into a woman to be married to the hero Koothvandavar. Our biblical readings include examples of feminine imagery applied to Yaweh — probably remnants of the goddess religions that once prevailed. Both Adam and Jesus are widely seen as androgynous figures. The Catholic elevation of Mary into the heavenly suite hints at the bisexuality of the Christian God.
The full flowering of the male-femaleness of God-man as one being came to mankind through Christian Science. How we individually live this out on the belief level will depend on personal history and belief systems. Some members felt it also depends on one's unique spiritual individuality. In all cases however it should be the work of our group and other spiritual outreaches to provide an atmosphere that encourages people to explore the facets of their sexuality as a very efficient means of getting clearer views of their completeness. Yes, sex is important—very important—in ushering one into his divine nature. Now, that was something we didn't expect to see when we got going on this topic!
For those who balk at getting into bed with someone to find their completeness, Freud can help out. He showed how virtually every thought and act embodies an erogenous element. Eating, studying, dropping a lover, shopping for antiques, serving at church and so on and on — all sex. For the Christian Scientist, whether genital sex or its sublimations, the point is bisexuality or spiritual completeness.
Members then described how their own bisexuality had unfolded and continues to reveal itself.
1) One member was attracted only to girls before he turned 13. He was cruelly rejected by several. Then he shifted to boys and men, where his luck was better. Energies now are mainly channeled into his career, but if the right guy comes along, who knows. Interestingly, women now often try to get him romantically entangled.
2) Another was attracted to boys when he was a kid and had sex with many. After puberty his attraction to males continued. He has had long term relationships with men. This last year he has had affairs with two women, but still feels his sexuality is stably homosexual.
3) Another remembers being attracted only to boys and men, but did have some little celibate romances with girls as he grew up. Several years ago heterosexual fantasies intruded and he promptly entered psychoanalysis. His analyst was able to help him fold these errant energies into his homosexuality. Once this integration was accomplished, he found he was able to experience love with other men, as he sought and found their "inner woman"and dared share his with them. Love affairs became kind of double dates!
4) Another has been attracted to both males and females and had sex with both since his early youth. He has had a number of long term relationships, mainly with men. Recently he has been single and relishes the freedom it has given him to find his own uniqueness unburdened by responsibilities to another. His study of Science has deepened.
A member brought in the "Blue Book"of unofficial writings of Mrs. Eddy (again available through the Bookmark, 1-800-220-7767) to read us what she says of bisexuality and sexual intercourse. Here are two quotes: "...there is never anything in my experience in which the male and female qualities are not infinitely at one..."and "....this desire (for sexual intercourse) is simply the divine idea, struggling to express itself in completeness."
A member gave a testimony of healing. He has been studying Christian Science seriously for a month after perhaps twenty years of interest in it as a sort of cultural phenomenon. He has wanted to let go of a cocktail of drugs he has been taking but is understandably fearful. It came to him that maybe the doctor would eventually suggest he was well enough to drop them. And sure enough, at the next appointment, the doctor did say he was in such good shape he could drop one of the drugs — the one with the worst side effects. He loves Christian Science and feels the promised unspeakable peace whenever he reads or prays in Science.
We were asked by a friend to help out with a problem — attraction to a married woman who is giving mixed signals. From this limited information we were able to come up with two points which should not be seen as contradictory.
1) Live Love — the Love that never heard of uncertainty, pain, jealousy, fear or whatever else mortal mind presents. Mrs. Eddy says of this practice that it will heal anything, even raise the dead.
2) If the love is not reciprocated — or even if it is — the present pain and confusion are a rare window into the soul. By retiring the projections from the unconscious currently activated by and resting upon the object of affection, one gets to relive, with feeling, lost childhood stuff and all the difficult and glorious material held in bondage by suppression. This is very difficult work and may require the help of a good therapist. Keep close to Christian Science in the process.
For next week. we picked a topic we've danced around for years — Sin. Here's an initial thought: it's a supposition based on the non-omnipotence and non-omnipresence of God.
O the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! how unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways past finding out! For who hath known the mind of the Lord? or who hath been his counsellor?
For of him, and through him, and to him, are all things: to whom be glory for ever. Amen.
God has built a higher platform of human rights, and He has built it on diviner claims. These claims are not made through code or creed, but in demonstration of "on earth peace, good-will toward men." Human codes, scholastic theology, material medicine and hygiene, fetter faith and spiritual understanding. Divine Science rends asunder these fetters, and man's birthright of sole allegiance to his Maker asserts itself.
Man and his Maker are correlated in divine Science, and real consciousness is cognizant only of the things of God.
Emerge gently from matter into Spirit.
The fading forms of matter, the mortal body and material earth, are the fleeting concepts of the human mind. They have their day before the permanent facts and their perfection in Spirit appear. The crude creations of mortal thought must finally give place to the glorious forms which we sometimes behold in the camera of divine Mind, when the mental picture is spiritual and eternal. Mortals must look beyond fading, finite forms, if they would gain the true sense of things. Where shall the gaze rest but in the unsearchable realm of Mind? We must look where we would walk, and we must act as possessing all power from Him in whom we have our being.
When we learn the way in Christian Science and recognize man's spiritual being, we shall behold and understand God's creation, — all the glories of earth and heaven and man.
Did the salvation of the eunuch depend merely on his believing that Jesus Christ was the Son of God?
It did; but this believing was more than faith in the fact that Jesus was the Messiah. Here the verb believe took its original meaning, namely, to be firm, — yea, to understand those great truths asserted of the Messiah: it meant to discern and consent to that infinite demand made upon the eunuch in those few words of the apostle. Philip's requirement was, that he should not only acknowledge the incarnation, — God made manifest through man, — but even the eternal unity of man and God, as the divine Principle and spiritual idea; which is the indissoluble bond of union, the power and presence, in divine Science, of Life, Truth, and Love, to support their ideal man. This is the Father's great Love that He hath bestowed upon us, and it holds man in endless Life and one eternal round of harmonious being. It guides him by Truth that knows no error, and with supersensual, impartial, and unquenchable Love. To believe is to be firm. In adopting all this vast idea of Christ Jesus, the eunuch was to know in whom he believed. To believe thus was to enter the spiritual sanctuary of Truth, and there learn, in divine Science, somewhat of the All-Father-Mother God. It was to understand God and man: it was sternly to rebuke the mortal belief that man has fallen away from his first estate; that man, made in God's own likeness, and reflecting Truth, could fall into mortal error; or, that man is the father of man. It was to enter unshod the Holy of Holies, where the miracle of grace appears, and where the miracles of Jesus had their birth, — healing the sick, casting out evils, and resurrecting the human sense to the belief that Life, God, is not buried in matter. This is the spiritual dawn of the Messiah, and the overture of the angels. This is when God is made manifest in the flesh, and thus it destroys all sense of sin, sickness, and death, — when the brightness of His glory encompasseth all being.