Healing Homophobia
October 9, 2008
To break this earthly spell, mortals must get the true idea and divine Principle of all that really exists and governs the universe harmoniously.
"We should have some insights on how to heal homophobia after our meetings finding the divine fact of homosexuality."
"First, why don't we recall some incidents where we felt homophobia?"
"Okay, but please stay clear of quackery. — in other words, setting up something that then needs to be healed."
"It's our topic!"
"Yes, and a Scientist would just say, ' Fine, nothing to heal’."
"That's so dismissive — it'd better be backed up with understanding. As Mrs. Eddy says, 'Declare that you are not hurt and understand the reason why...'."
"Okay, fine. I'd still like to hear some experiences. We can keep them unreal, suppositional, till we give them the kibosh."
"Who'd like to start?"
"I will. I've got plenty of internalized homophobia. Maybe I could point to parents who rigidly enforced sexual, gender roles — or peers who made fun of me. But now I've arranged my life to avoid the outer monsters, and still I have lots of inner resentments and self-judgments."
"How do you avoid homophobes? Do you go out into the public?"
"Yes, of course, but there — like at the gym or in the street — I keep the sparkle to a minimum."
"Good. We need to think of safety."
"And energy conservation."
"I'll talk. I got a lot of abuse growing up. As a kid I was the class fag. Later as a teen, there were social pressures and physical threats. One guy became friends with me and I decided to join his church where the people seemed loving and supportive. It was the Jehova's Witnesses! Well, when they discovered my homosexuality, I was first shunned and then put out of the church."
"How are you today?"
"I'm basically open with people — but there was one other problem in the past. I lied about my homosexuality to get into the army. There were jokes from the first day about me — and threats. Finally I was discharged."
' Me? Well, I had a very difficult time once I found out what being Gay was and how terrible and dangerous it was to be seen that way. Looking back now, before I got the news, I was really free and would ride my bike to construction sites where I could look at workmen with their shirts off. I mean, I was ten or something and I was ecstatic at the sight of them.
"Later I got help from psychotherapy and could come to terms with some childhood issues. During this period I got into a romantic relationship with a fellow who left me to become a heterosexual through Exodus International..."
"What's that?"
"It's called Exodus International. They're a kind of right wing homophobic Jesus mill. Anyway this whole episode updated and inflamed certain crib level agonies in the original family romance — and it was the perfect vehicle to rake it all up for confrontation and healing. Science was and continues to be invaluable in this process."
"Did the guy become straight?"
"I don't think so. I still see him lurking around the fringes of the Gay community. Maybe he's seeking converts for Exodus."
"Do you want to say anything?"
"Sure. I had very understanding parents. My mother actually informed me I was Gay and took me to a shrink to make sure I accepted myself. I sometimes wish there'd been some resistance, so I could have had to fight for my sexuality."
"Today I'm pretty much out to everybody. I make a point of speaking up if there's some fag joke — or even when there isn't! By the way, some of those homophobes are the best tricks."
"Let's get some metaphysics going. I'll read from Mrs. Eddy's autobiographical sketch 'Mere historic incidents and personal events are frivolous and of no moment, unless they illustrate the ethics of Truth. To this end, but only to this end, such narrations may be admissible and advisable; but if spiritual conclusions are separated from their premises, the nexus is lost, and the argument, with its rightful conclusions, becomes correspondingly obscure. The human history needs to be revised, and the material record expunged' (Ret 21: 25-2). So our history can be seen perhaps as a dualistic representation — in other words a good and evil version — of what's true and real."
"Give us some pointers on how you'd apply that to what we've been describing."
"I don't know. There aren't any formulas."
"As an example I'd just close my eyes, feel out to God and start reversing the case."
"Ask questions. Who is the cause of everything? Who is my father? Who is my mother? Who are my peers? Is there a past?"
"Like these people and things aren't real?"
"They're real — but not just as material concepts. They're divine ideas, totally good."
"If we're talking about dualistic concepts, couldn't we pair homophobia with Gay Pride? Any material concept will have good and evil aspects."
"Much as I hate to say so, you're right!"
"That just makes it clear, whenever we're dealing with a concept we have to be aware of the divine idea being displayed in that form."
"It's not always easy. I was getting close to a guy on the internet when suddenly we got into quoting scripture at each other. At first I thought 'Oh boy — this isn't going anywhere. We're both so riven with homophobia we can't let ourselves have our natural feelings.' I don't know where it'll end up, but after praying I could see these seeming fusillades of scripture as God peeking through the concept of two people relating and hailing Himself as the one I or Us."
"Last Sunday at church the soloist sang Psalm 139 which includes the line about rising up to Heaven or making my bed in hell. I saw in a flash that it's up to me — my ego—how I live the fact of Oneness. Will I make it a Heaven, accompanied by homophilia, or a hell filled with homophobia?"
"You think you have a choice?"
"Yes, but it may take some deep work to get there. If I'm unconscious about what I'm doing, the choice will be made by my genes and memories but if I bring Christian Science into action, I can allow God to re-educate me and help me make a wiser choice."
"Hey I like that. As the psalm says, God is always right at hand no matter what craziness I've put myself through."
"We'd be remiss if we didn't do some work on the economic situation. The Dow was down over 700 today."
"They say it's no longer a Wall Street thing — it's spreading out."
"I'm afraid to open my broker statements. One woman in my yoga class says she's checking out the cat food aisle."
"An expert on Bloomberg pointed out the fundamentals of the economy are strong. We have the talent, the entrepreneurial spirit and the productive capacity. Once credit is freed up, they'll get going again."
"It'll take a return of confidence to get us out of the freeze-up."
"Can anyone say something scientific? I'm feeling totally mesmerized."
"Well — confidence in the Lord, not in all the wild gyrations and predictions."
"' To those leaning on the sustaining infinite, to-day is big with blessings.' [ Science and Health page vii. ] "
"Exactly!"
"Here's something from the responsive readings of the Lesson on Unreality: ' For they that sleep sleep in the night; and they that be drunken are drunken in the night. But let us, who are of the day, be sober, putting on the breastplate of faith and love; and for helmet, the hope of salvation' (I Thess 5: 7, 8 ). We were drunk — completely addicted to money. And we're waking up."
"This is good from Science and Healh if we're swamped in matter — particularly if it's positive. ' If you wish to know the spiritual fact, you can discover it by reversing the material fable, be the fable pro or con, — be it in accord with your preconceptions or utterly contrary to them' (S&H 129: 7-10 ). "
"You're not running down good human experiences?"
"No — they're fine, as long as they're backed up by some understanding of the divine idea being represented. I think that's what Mrs. Eddy is saying."
"If we get back to the practicality of Jesus' teaching, we keep our treasure in Heaven, but that Heaven includes earth: ' Thy will be done in earth as it is in Heaven.'"
"And look at the Prodigal Son. No matter how much we've strayed, we can always get back to harmony."
"The older brother also has his chance to accept harmony or collapse into envy and resentment. I love the way Jesus leaves it hanging—which way will he go — which way will we go?"
"We need to close. Are there any suggestions for a topic?"
"Why don't we take the Emergence Conference topic, Abundanza, as our topic too?"
"Why's it in Italian?"
"Doesn't it sound lush?"
"It's pretty broad, but it's okay. I'm going to try and find the abundance in the current situation.'
"Loss is gain!"
"Maybe. In the sense of losing dependence on material beliefs and anchoring understanding in the Truth."
"This'll be a three week topic. That way we'll get some input from people who're going to the conference."