Our topic grew out of members' interest in a Christian Science testimony reported in the latest issue of the Emergence newsletter In Between Times. Our facilitator read a few excerpts, including the following:

"...I was not about to get into a relationship just 'not to be alone'. I found myself really frustrated, as I felt I had a lot of love to share.... Finally it became just tiresome, so I let go...and realized that it was not so much a 'person' that I wanted, as a consciousness of Love....I saw that there is only one reality, and that is Spirit, Love....The results were immediate. I spent a week or two just completely suffused with love. I didn't feel like a human trying to love things and people."

A week later this member of Emergence met someone with whom he now finds himself "in the most comfortable, relaxed and loving relationship that I have experienced. What seems most important is to 'keep it in heaven' — the infinite uninterrupted harmony of Love, and infinite man in Love's image."

Next, a bumpy transition to some musings by one member on the psychological drives in partnerships. In this view, very little in romantic or business dyads is about current people or situations, which are freighted with hidden (unconscious) childhood, shadow and even divine material. Unknown and unacknowledged motifs based on this material work their way into current relationships and are projected unto our "other". One overpowering drive is to get the "other" to be one's replacement mother or father. Even to get back to a womb-like existence, where every need and want is taken care of. As our member remarked, "Our first traumatic break-up is birth."

Other examples of projection came up. One member noted how he had been associated with very angry people, and wondered whether this might have to do with his view of himself as a loving, good, long-suffering person. Another recalled flipping for a guy at church whom he saw as deeply spiritual.

While this part of our discussion could be seen as dealing with the processes and foibles of mortal mind, it prepared the ground for a more radical move into the healing powers of Christian Science, glowing from beneath the troubling dualities.

One member spoke of his quest during the week to redeem past failed relationships. There were a lot, we'll report here on three. In one he learned the difference between love and mere sex; in another he saw how he manipulated a lover to carry the anger in the relationship, while he luxuriated in absolutism above the fray — indeed, he barely noticed the eventual break-up although for years afterwards he suffered from alternating dread and sexual attraction to this man. Finally he told of how a lover activated primal Oedipal feelings, in this case for his father, when the lover left to be converted to heterosexuality — i.e., heterosexism — by Exodus. (P.S. It didn't work).

His work in Science was and is to convert the lead-like "childhood, shadow and divine material" revealed in his psychological fine tooth comb into its actual divine gold. He studied and used the directive in this passage from Unity of Good: "The use of a lie is that it unwittingly confirms Truth, when handled by Christian Science, which reverses false testimony and gains a knowledge of God from opposite facts, or phenomena." (Mary Baker Eddy, p. 36:6)

He had to conclude that while psychology is a useful tool, it won't heal per se. Indeed, if that were all we had the best we could hope for is a kind of sad invalidism, hobbling bravely on, having accepted that no one could meet our inordinate needs, so why have them? The student of Christian Science can move the case to the court of Spirit, out of the hands of matter, and truly recover.

Another member, visiting from abroad, gave a moving testimony of how he and his lover of twenty years recovered the love in their relationship. They had been very angry with and judgmental of each other, when our member became ill. He decided to move in with a friend who would care for him. Suddenly this friend had to leave for several days and our member became despondent. Should he go back to the impossible situation at home? He delayed a decision, but found himself wanting to be with his lover, to be cared for by him. He prayed and listened. The thought came to just make the lover "right"; to drop all the judging, all the criticism, etc. He returned home and as he maintained the view of his lover as right, divinely right, the partnership repaired itself rapidly. Both partners practiced this new view. They were in love again! Their love, now established on Principle, spilled over into friendships and business; many bad practices and grievances were healed there too.

Another member recounted a healing of food poisoning or intestinal flu during the week based on his study and acceptance of the principle set forth in this statement from Christian Science Re-Explored, by Margaret Laird: "Illness is not lack of health, but is Health, disposing of the belief of health." (p.126) Yes, he had been drifting along, accepting himself and others as mortals, being well or sick depending on what they did or thought. Such materia medica and semi metaphysics were dropped in favor of the fact that man is divine idea. The healing was instantaneous.

A few concluding crumbs that almost fell from the table:

1) Partnerships are not about being rocked, tossed and burped but about spiritual growth. They may and probably will be painful, at least to some extent. This is the cross that brings the crown.

2) Contagion is unconscious relationship. When threatened we can become conscious and realize the infinity of God, rather than the stealthy counterfeit thereof.

3) Doris Henty has a chapter in her book Addresses and Other Writings on Christian Science called "There is No Unwedded State". It describes the "Espousals Supernal" — the marginal note on page 561 of Science and Health. These are the pre-existent oneness and male-femaleness of God and man. She quotes a line from Unity of Good: "Hourly, in Christian Science, man thus weds himself with God, or rather he ratifies a union predestined from all eternity" (p. 17:7-9).

For next week, our topic is Self-Interest. A member was moved by the news story about wealthy individuals petitioning the President to forego his plan to eliminate estate taxes apparently on the basis of fairness and the need for balanced growth of the economy. Can we see beyond our own needs and wants to those of others?